It Gets Going
With
‘‘Me’’
Photo Credit-lovepanky.com
Suppose I am asked in an interview to deliver a picture perfect 15 minutes presentation about ‘ME’? I will presume that I am an expert on ‘ME’ and start with my name, qualifications, job experience etc. But if I am stopped and told instead to give full accurate appreciation of ‘who am I’, ‘how I am’, and ‘how I am viewed by others’, I bet I will be anxious to begin with and may not be able to give a satisfactory presentation about ‘ME ’ and may fumble.
Today having grown in age and professional maturity, I have realized the significance and worth of defining and evaluating ‘SELF’ and being fully ‘SELF AWARE’. As it is said that, “The easiest person to deceive is one’s own self”. I bet most of us have never ever thought of Self-assessing themselves except may be little bit here and there when we may repeatedly fail to achieve our personal goals. “Who Am I” therefore is the most thoughtful and powerful aspect of our persona and character. I opine that it is the major inner and outer scan of our being?
‘Who Am I’?
How often have we bend over-to light our inner- self and be familiar with ‘Who am I’? It is most important self-query and is liable to make us become stronger and more authentic as we become self- awake. The question is what is my uniqueness and exclusivity and what about the inner personality dynamics? I may be satisfied and contended provided I accept for being my true self- ‘who am I’ and not someone I copy and I may not. Defining ‘I’ is not about building my special image for the outside world; it is about having exclusive combination of logic and feelings that denotes characteristics such as my skills, strengths and weaknesses, principles, ethos, passions etc. that distinguishes me. “Who am I” is the most thoughtful self-introspection of my life and surely if I don’t know it, how would I know others who come in my contact? ‘My identity is the concept I develop about myself that evolves over the course of my life. It may build up over time and can change, sometimes radically, depending on circumstances and what directions I take in my life to’. For instance, as part of my HR responsibilities during my career, I was regularly interviewing candidates for Managerial and other senior positions such as vice presidents etc. I would begin personal discussions by asking the candidates to “tell something about them like why were they unique etc”. Rarely did I come across candidates who could answer this question precisely. They would tell me about their name, qualifications, family background; hobbies etc. forgetting that it were already given in the curriculum vita. This shows how most are badly informed about their real personal identity. As a result they often face obstacles in relationships and working in teams/groups in organizations. ‘Who Am I’ is therefore a vital effort in trying to know my inner and exterior persona features, be Self-aware of my feelings, Self-confidence, strong and weak points, interests etc. It is therefore absolutely important for me to carry out detailed self-awareness analyses to decode my own identity. Find what is that makes me only one of its kind and unique.
Photo –Mor Shani (Unsplash)
Isn’t it strange that we habitually assess others while we usually don’t know our self? No doubt I may be a stable individual with the same name and body. But am I really the same person? Over a lifetime, I might have changed to a large extent- what I as a ten year old, is nothing like when I was thirty or even totally different today. Irrespective of changing my name, occupation, exterior personality features, I still continue pure ‘I’. However, unless I am able to answer ‘Who Am I?’ No ownership, profession, and person, will ever satisfy me for long. My identity therefore is most important and certainly the concept I develop about myself that evolves over the course of my life. It builds up over time and can change, sometimes drastically, depending on situations and what directions I may take during my life time.
What Makes Me Unique?
I am an individual with exceptional internal and external personality attributes and this needs to get reflected in ‘ME’. Become conscious of this and enjoy doing up my story! Have the boldness to be different and my sense of worth will become passionate and excited. As they say, “Be a writer of your life and reader of your mind. The more you know yourself, the less you need approval of others”.
My
Principles
I need to think about my values, ethos, principles and beliefs that need to get reflected in ‘ME’ and start living with these by constantly self-improving. Try avoiding preferably mid ground while working with values and beliefs. Yes it might be difficult at times but I have to regal out and take a balanced call.
My
Internal Identity
My behavior and strength of mind makes me exclusive and I should value these. Spotlight on what positives I have in these two characteristics. What do I think are good features in my behavior which helps me to attract others? What people may like or dislike about my temperament? Improvements here will raise my self-significance to a large extent.
Myself in Relation to Others
If I believe I have a low standing, I will suffer low self-respect but if I feel I have a high reputation this will help me to elevate my self-esteem. What is desired is to feel happier and improve on my sense of worth by believing in myself.
Self
identify visa-a visa My Job?
My job may not define ‘Who Am I’; it is only what I do and how I do it. My personal goals may speak a lot about ‘Who Am I’ and the principles I hold. Surely I need to improve on my sense of worth by having goals that principally move me closer to being ‘who am I’ really.
Self-knowledge
Becoming extra self-attentive helps me to look at apprehensions and anxiety more objectively in my job. As part of revamping ‘ME’, it is imperative to self-understand how I perform my work and how I relate with others and manage my own feelings. Self-knowledge is being mindful of what I am superior at while conceding what I am novice at. Self-awareness is a skill and capability that may help me in leaving constructive impressions around. Sherrie Campbell in her book “Loving Yourself: The Master of Being Your Own Person” believes that “Self-awareness — the ability to monitor one’s own emotions and reactions — is the key factor in leadership success.”
Reactivate
Yourself
Knowing the scope of my personal identity, is it any way going to make me successful overnight? Surely it will help to improve my key abilities in communications and relationships gradually. It shall generate fellow feelings and develop an attitude for -- Empathy, Warmth and Compassion. It is a stepladder to help and meet my aspirations of reaching higher levels of my being. As someone has put it beautifully, “Your perception of me is a reflection of you; my reaction to you is an awareness of me”.
1 It shall guide my thoughts and feelings to make necessary changes to my persona. It is therefore absolutely important to carry out objective Self-awareness analyses to understand my own identity and what is that makes me unique.
2 Rewrite my story by jotting my personal qualities and features i.e. all about ‘what my personal interests are and what I want to be known to others.
3 Keep revising and if possible have frank discussions with my confidants. I feel as long as I am able to open up about me honestly; I shall be at the doorstep of defining and understanding ‘WHO Am I ’.
4 Should I consciously practice self-awareness, I may evaluate how my values, passions, and goals fit into my current feelings and how to align them better. I may also understand how others view me and help create stronger relationships around.
5 Listening without judging others will surely help to understand people better. But remember listening is no way just hearing, it is an exercise in being focused and attentive to what the speaker is communicating.
6 While monitoring my Self-talk (Talking to myself/mind which is 95% negative) recognize my strong negatives for improvements.
To tap it --Defining ‘I’ is not about building my special image for the outside world. It is about combination of my feelings and thought process, strong and weak features, principles, culture, way of life and passions. By using these features and qualities to distinguish ‘ME ’ , be different, a class in itself and be counted and looked upon.
Bhushan
Kachru
Blogger
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